It's all coming back to me now...

...I was such a brat sometimes to my dear mother....

the same is true in regards to my brothers and sister...my close friends...my dear husband...

...if ever someone had a misspeak, an error...I was merciless.

I would poke fun incessantly. Usually until the verbally clumsy party was totally angry at me...and then I would relent.

If DNA is to blame...there are roots of this "teasing" well back into the family tree.

And it lives again in the newest generation of my family...

Last night we were at our Friday hang-out. We finish our week with pizza and then conversation at the English-speaking coffee house upstairs.

I realized that the waiter did not bring us glasses for the kids' drinks.

So, in my best local dialect, I informed the waiter that we needed some glasses.

At that point, The Bug, in a shrill...LOUD VOICE...said "M-AAAAAAH-M, you just asked him for a BLANKET!"

It was a slight, tonal problem...but she was right...I had asked for a blanket.

It was then that the sharks saw blood...

My own offspring, laughing mercilessly at me..."Wow Mom, it is cold, but I'm not sure they have blankets here with dinner!" Magpie said, eyes alight with her mockery of her poor, illiterate mother...

I shot them a few, "I know where you sleep at night" looks, all to their frenzied pleasure...

Then we settled in to eat.

A few minutes later, I discovered that unfortunately the waiter had shorted us one glass (not a blanket) and that another request was in order...

Fearful, but knowing one must always get back up on the horse that has thrown them, I say loudly, in a clear voice..."Waiter, we need one more glass please."

Or so I thought...

Magpie literally EXPLODES in laughter...."M-AAAAAAAH-M....you just asked him for a NOSE!"

She continues, just over the cacophony of laughter around the table (including Daddy who likewise didn't know the difference between blanket, nose and glass but couldn't resist the feeding frenzy), in her best imitation Momma voice "Uh, please waiter, please could you bring me a nose? Mine doesn't seem to be working and I'm unable to smell my food!"

There they all were...

...my offspring...
...my dear husband...

...nearly hyperventilating with the kind of laughter that makes your sides ache...all relishing my error!

And then it all came back to me...

...how many times had I walked in their shoes...in the seat of power...laughing at one of my kin and their unfortunate misuse of the English language...?

...alas, I did not feel so superior anymore...

...but the haughty eyes of my children said it all...

...my mother was right...

"Someday your kids will tease you and you'll deserve every minute of it!"

...like a freight train coming down the tracks...I have many years and many offspring from which I will be the butt of the joke...

So I would like to take this opportunity to say sorry to my dear mother...and the rest of my family...

Signed,

Apologetic in Asia