One of the great things about raising children is that you are continually reminded that they are often the better teachers than we. Like some months ago, when I told Bub that he needed to hurry and be more independent when it came to dressing in our many winter layers. I was frustrated and felt grouchy about fighting to keep him focused in the tight time constraints we have each morning.
I snarkily said to Bub, "Look at The Singer, he is two years older than you and he is getting himself dressed all alone! You can do that too!"
Bub considered the facts for the moment with his fifth shirt over his head, but arms dangling lifelessly uninhabited. He tilted his head, looked at his little brother (the one I had just compared him to, in a maternally unwise fashion), then he smiled broadly at The Singer, patted him on the shoulder and said, "Good Job brother, you're doing a good job all alone, without any help!" It was so genuine and beautiful. I sat there shocked at his lesson of grace and generosity. I want to be so much more like my son, Bub.
Today, as the Tomb Sweeping holiday continues, we enjoyed more projects and various activities in our new family-way. I took Ezra out with all his siblings, to the playground, where we met with his new teaching aide. She will be hired by our family to go to school with him, to help him engage in all areas of the classroom possible, and to tend to any special issues he might have.
Ezra wheeled out, still a bit shyly, but with a cautious smile as he met his new aide, and the head teacher for his kindergarten room, my friend, Joanna. After awhile, a crowd of local village kids and other parents of small children came to the playground. They all wanted to see Ezra. At first I worried that he would be a bit of a side-show, but in fact, he sat up proudly in his wheelchair meeting new person after new person. Each one of them becoming charmed by his smile and gentle personality. After some thirty minutes I saw how many of the most rough and tumble kids, were eagerly engaging with Ezra. Some of the older ones stroking his face or playing peek-a-boo. Mothers of babies and hosts of others came and smiles and shook his hand, or greeted him warmly.
I had a deep sense of knowing today that we will all learn a great deal from Ezra. He will be a great teacher not only for us, but for this whole community.
Below: Daddy measures Ezra for the custom sleds he's making for Ezra to use at school and at home...of course Brownie is there to help, too.
Below: Ezra is smitten with his Daddy.
Above: Ezra needed a haircut desperately, so we were so pleased when one of our teammates, Mrs. S came over to give him a haircut...he is still happy in the above shot.
Below: Ezra is fascinated with Brownie's glasses.
Below: The last of the happy moments of the haircut...I now know WHY his hair was so long! He HATES haircuts! ;)
Below: shots of the wedding, Brownie and Bub, the Bride and Groom
Below: The Bride at the reception! What a party!!!
Below: One of the reception musicians...he as also a groomsman.
Below: Other members of the wedding party.
Below: Nehemiah shows us that he TRULY loves to dance. He was keeping time with the music as he danced with his sister. Absolutely darling as he spun her around the room.
Below: The Groom (Bub) and one of the bridesmaids (Bug) cut a rug, too.
Nehemiah is transforming. He so desires to do what we ask of him. When we sat down at the table for breakfast this morning, he told all the siblings loudly that they must fold their hands because we had to do some "talking with our eyes closed" before we could eat! Then he told them that no one could leave the table until everyone was finished eating. He looked at me and smiled warmly to show that he was doing what we'd asked of him. I thought about him in that moment, how he has experienced a total change in his life in just these past five days, and yet he is really trying to do what he can to adapt. It would be natural for him to resist, to fight, to complain for sometime all the changes that are being required of him. But he is not. Instead, he is trying his best to engage with us, and to do what he must to become a family member.
I'm learning a great deal about my own adaptability and attitudes by watching Nehemiah. How I fight circumstances that make me change my behaviors, customs, and attitudes! Too often I drag my feet and protest the necessary adaptations to "blend in." I want to be more like my son Nehemiah. He is resilient, he is brave, and he has a willing attitude. What a man he will grow up to be with those qualities!
Tomorrow we're off to sweep the tombs with our local Chinese family. I promise photos from this most authentic cultural experience!
Grace and Peace to you who are following along.
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