What a wild weekend it was two years ago. The Drummer Boy was in our very city, so the drive to pick him up at Civil Affairs was a cheap trip! He had seen us before, so when we walked in, he held up his hand at five and a half years old, and simply said, "Ni Hao." Then the next day we boarded the fast train for the next province over to pick up The Charmer. The Drummer Boy told me, as we rode on that train, "your family has a lot of kids, but I'm the best one." Oh, that bravado...still present today. Thankfully gone are the days of literally climbing the walls, standing on tables, and shocking us in public! He is sensitive and bright soul that still reveals to us heart-wrenching details of his five years before us. He certainly is a survivor.
After getting off the train and arriving at the hotel...then just 10 of us...The Charmer had been brought out from the orphanage (only probably his second trip into the outside world in 4.5 years.) They had him sitting on a blue couch in the hotel lobby...and he just looked TINY, BREAKABLE, and PITIFUL. I burst into tears...out of fear. I was overwhelmed with the "I CANNOT do this! What were we thinking? What will this do to the family?" Magpie told me to "get it together, Mom...don't worry about tomorrow...just think about NOW." Brownie, who had found The Charmer in the orphanage and had made a pledge to him one year before that "(she) would be back" for him...pressed to the front...to SHOW HIM she'd kept her promise...when he saw her and recognized her from the photo we'd sent of the two of them from the days she visited the orphanage...he said, "Big Sister, you came!" We were all undone. THANK GOD we did not run away, but embraced and began to GIVE THANKS for the miracles of the future for him! Even now, we're seeing the miracles being done for him!
Just two days ago at the hospital, our friend was sitting with The Charmer. We had run out to settle the other kids and to try to get some things together for this week. The Charmer was not thrilled about our being gone...and given his history of being in an orphanage (even a beautiful privately funded orphanage full of loving caregivers)...we think he's probably a bit more sensitive to being in any "institution." Anyway, he told our friend:
"I have a Mom, and a Dad, and a Family...bring them back here."
I have thought about that several times in the past few days. He was declaring, insisting, that she recognize that he is an orphan no more. He knows that he belongs to us and that we belong to him. The miracle of adoption. The stunningly gorgeous truth of family...where there was once just a boy who lived in the orphanage in a room full of babies.
While I was with The Charmer in the big, scary recovery room last week, one thought kept pressing its way to the top of my mind...every child needs a mom and a dad to fight for them, to fiercely protect them, and to give them a refuge from the rest of the world that may never rightly recognize their unique brilliance.
Every child needs a family. Yet on Friday, I will go back to the Children's Home, a highly-developed, top-tier institution...and face a classroom full of children who do not have a mom and a dad. They have wonderful nannies, and caring orphanage directors...but there is no substitution for parents. This is one of the greatest injustices of the world...that poverty, illness, crisis, and in some cases, simple delusion...rob children of their families. The most vulnerable among us are without the shelter that only a loving family can bring.
Adoption is tough. What a hard road it has been in many ways and it is NOT a romantic combination of rainbows and ladybugs! But THANK GOD we get a break from the hard realities once an awhile and we can marvel at the truth that these two boys have a mom, and a dad, and a family (both here and on the other side of the world) who love them...and it all began for them two years ago, today!
How blessed we are to call them our own.
Above: The Drummer Boy, now seven years old!
Above: The Charmer...in the orphanage, no more! Now six years old!
Above & Below: FAMILY
Happy Family Day boys! You belong to us...forever.
1 comment:
What an amazing family !. I admire you all greatly. Keep up the wonderful work an may you continue to know the Lords leading and blessing.
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